I’ve no time to write a real blog today – I’ve a million things to do at home, and then I’m co-hosting Lix and Kix at the 806 at 7 p.m.  I’ll be back in the next coupla days with some real blogs, including video from a great night of poetry in Toledo a week ago and photos from another great night of poetry at the Literary Cafe last Thursday.  Meanwhile, here’s something silly I posted on Facebook yesterday, which resulted in at least a hundred often very funny comments.  Maybe if no one minds, I’ll copy folks’ comments here when I have a moment later today.

Google “[your first name] needs” and share the first 10 results. That’s it: it is that simple. But be honest! Tag the person who tagged you, and pass it on…

Here are my unadulterated results:

1. Oct 16, 2005 … All you do is Google the phrase, “your first name needs” (as in John needs) and put the first ten entries in your blog. [You mean this has been going around since 2005? I just caught the caboose of the train.]

2. Big Bad John Needs a Hug. [I’m not big, not bad – but can I still have the hug?]

3. John Needs Help Ask John. [I get by with a little help from my friends – even if that was Ringo and not John.]

4. John needs 13 bottles of water from the store. John can only carry 3 at a time. What is the minimum number of trips John needs to make? [Little known fact – at one point in my life I was a mathematics major – seriously.]

5. John Needs Joe, Now More than Ever. [Hey Joe, where you going with that gun in your hand?]

6. Elton John Needs Rest After Throat Surgery. [I guess that’s why they call it the blues.]

7. Not EVERY John needs a plumber. [Hear that, Joe?!?!]

8. Don John needs charisma. [Charisma’s not another plumber, is she?]

9. John needs to embrace family values. Pat Robertson’s been reading…. [Quit confusing me with McCain, dammit! What is this, a vast right-wing conspiracy?]

10. Fort St. John needs workers–no experience required. [And here I had no clue any fort had named me its saint. Did Pat – or Joe – or Charisma, for that matter – have anything to do with it?]

Maybe I shoulda done this as Jesus instead of as John.